[pct-l] PCT article in the Ashland Daily Tidings: "They're Coming!"

[Melanie Clarke]

Couldn't stop laughing!  I can't believe how amusing the truth can be!
 You, Jackass and a few others on this list are extremely clever writers.

T

On Sat, Jul 14, 2012 at 1:55 PM, CHUCK CHELIN <steeleye at wildblue.net> wrote:

> Good afternoon, All,
>
> If the smell-test at Ashland was the prime criterion I would figuratively
> take a day-hiker under my wing and let him/her slide in with me to get a
> free beer since I would probably have enough smell for both of us.
> Unfortunately,
> that scheme probably wouldn’t work: There are just too many other
> differences between “hiker-trash” and  “trash-hikers” – oops, I mean
> “day-hikers”.
>
> While long-distance hiker aroma is usually pretty strong, it’s likely the
> perfumes that day-hikers slaver on in great abundance may be stronger.
>  Soap,
> cologne, conditioner, hairspray, deodorant, mouth wash, and maybe a few
> other layers I don’t remember, can be enough to make a real hiker’s eyes
> water.  Any hint of that and the free beer is forfeit.
>
> Thru-hikers will probably have that lean, gaunt look while day hikers are
> still smooth and nicely rounded.  That gaunt look is the reason that --
> when thru-hikers are in the area -- the bears hide their own food in trees.
>
> Legs are a key in indicator:  Thru-hikers have slim, tightly-corded,
> muscles, without much extra bulk of anything – fat or muscle.   Those legs
> are likely to be well tanned, at least between the bottom of the shorts and
> the tops of the gaiters, and the skin will be dirty in spite of the
> spit-bath just before arriving.  The ladies’ legs will probably be almost
> as harry as the men’s.
>
> Next, a look at the hands.  A thru-hiker will probably show a relatively
> un-tanned stripe across the back of the wrist where the trekking pole strap
> covers.  On the thru-hiker ladies, any hint of nail polish will have been
> long gone while the day-ladies will still be neatly and colorfully
> manicured.
>
> A look at their faces is revealing:  The thru-hiker guys will almost always
> have a beard, but it will be shaggy while the day-guys will be neatly
> trimmed.  The thru-gals will look as though they hadn’t used a cream,
> potion, lotion, or any other makeup in months – which will be true.  That’s
> much in contrast to the pretty, fresh, peaches-‘n-cream visage of the
> day-gals.
>
> As for the cloths, the thru-hiker persons will be shabby, drab, faded, and
> mismatched beyond description.  No day-hike person would be allowed to
> leave REI in that condition:  The staff would throw a net over them and
> drag them back inside for a complete re-do.  Shoes might be the exception:
>  If
> the thru-hiker had just resupplied they may be wearing brand-spanking-new
> shoes with all their pretty, bright colors – so bright and conspicuous, in
> fact, one would be tempted to call the wardrobe department to tell them
> that someone screwed-up big time; the costume just isn’t right.
>
> Finally there can be lots more indicators, but listen to snips of their
> conversation:  “…pretty soon…” to a thru-hiker means Cascade Locks, while
> “… pretty soon…” to a day hiker means Pilot Rock.
>
> Steel-Eye
>
> -Hiking the Pct since before it was the PCT – 1965
>
> http://www.trailjournals.com/steel-eye
>
> http://www.trailjournals.com/SteelEye09/
>
>
> On Sat, Jul 14, 2012 at 10:52 AM, Brick Robbins <brick at brickrobbins.com
> >wrote:
>
> > my favortite quote
> >
> > ""They can't be day hikers to get the free beer," he says. "They don't
> > get it unless they smell bad."
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