[pct-l] social interaction / dealing with disagreeable people...

[Gerry Zamora]

Well said tom.
Gerry
On Jan 10, 2011 12:56 AM, "Tom Hudson" <vertigelt at gmail.com> wrote:
> I think the seeming anonymity of the Internet, combined with the lack of
> immediacy, allows for folks to be far more outspoken and confrontational
> than they would ever be in real life. You know the cliché about waiting
> overnight to send that inflammatory email in response to a work colleague
> (or moreso to a distribution list)... It's because people, when their
> fingers meet with the keyboard, find themselves suddenly able to express
all
> the things they wish they were ballsy or clever enough to say if they were
> ever in conflict with someone in person. As you stew over the most recent
> slight, the wittiest, grittiest comeback is right at your fingertips.
>
> Folks don't do that in real person (mostly) because folks, in public, want
> to be liked, want to be popular. Dominating is not as important as being
> included. Online, when separated by several minutes or hours, and hundreds
> of miles, it'snot about being included. The best way to win friends is by
> winning the apparent competition. In real life, on the trail, it's a
> discovery of self that is only enriched by sharing it with others. I think
> the spirit of the trail is that of exeberant celebration and sometimes
> painful hope. The spirit of the Internet seems to have always been
> contrariness.
>
> I fall victim to it as much as the next guy/gal. Instead of saying,
"C'mon,
> mate. It doesn't have to be like that," and then extending a hand, it's
> easier to say that the other person, in public and in front of everyone's
> mutual peers, is behaving inapprioriately. Even if politely stated, it's
> not always the best etiquette. Olive branches seem to be a rare commodity
> in cyberspace.
>
> So, to anyone *I* might have offended in such a way, I'll state now: sorry
> 'bout that. I get kinda riled up when it seems my personal honor is on the
> line. But there's no need. Doesn't matter if it's justified. There are
> better paths. They're just harder to find when we're not sharing together
> the fairest stretch of Earth ever warmed by the sun.
>
> /Tom
>
> On Sun, Jan 9, 2011 at 12:52 PM, Paul Robison <paulrobisonhome at yahoo.com
>wrote:
>
>> in 2010 i met over 100 hikers; and i found i got along well with all of
>> them
>> except one... who was all in all a good guy; just too stoned to make any
>> sense;
>> and in turn quite LOUD
>>
>> this listserv though seems to have a completely different demographic
than
>> a lot
>> of the people i met; or at least a more diverse one. Ranging from people
>> who i
>> would likely feel like family around instantly... to those i honestly
hope
>> i
>> never see.
>>
>> nothing against them personally, the world is full of diverse people...
>> but my
>> question is; how do you guys on the trail deal with the people you don't
>> get
>> along with ? did anyone on here who has thru-hiked had a hard time
finding
>> a
>> clique they fit in with? do you think the experince forms bonds where
>> before
>> there likely would be none?
>>
>> have you guys found the internet personalities on here to be drastically
>> different than what you experienced on trail? ...i have.
>>
>> Do any of the vets have experience with this? a lot of loud and outspoken
>> people on list; but when we all show up in campo; it becomes magically
>> copacetic.
>>
>>
>> thanks for the input,
>> ~Paul
>>
>>
>>
>>
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