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[pct-l] When to enter the Sierras; dealing with fear



I would agree with you Jeff: June is a great time to be inthe Sierras.

For most of the years between 1972 and 1999, I planned and went into the
Sierras on solo hikes and climbs which were from 9-14 days, and invariably
they started in June.  I would be on trail for the first and last two days
of the trip, and sometimes on an occaisional day in between.  Otherwise I
did everything cross country.  My goal often was to get into the most
remote areas I could and climb peaks.
There is a tremendous amount of Talus in the Sierras if you are climbing or
going from cirque to cirque on a traverse.  When it is snow covered it
makes it a little easier(not always), there is still plenty of rock hopping
and leaping from boulder to boulder even then.  I was always very caution,
being alone, and am an experienced mountaineer.  The timing was such that I
usually was in the Sierras on the last two weeks in June and tried to come
out either just before the fourth of july or just after.
IN THE SIERRAS THERE IS A VERY LARGE DIFFERNCE BETWEEN EARLY JUNE AND LATE
JUNE.  I never saw anybody until I was coming out.  The Sierras are empty
until the weekend of the fourth of july

There was always a lot of fear to deal with because invariably over the
years I managed to get into some dicey situations.  I learned to deal with
it,and it was a real learning experience. These are some of the things that
it took me 30 years to learn (I am a slow learner, and exceptionally
tenacious about going forward,even when scared stiff).

I always have the option of quiting at any time.

I have the option of turning around at any time; if I come up against an
obstacle that I find daunting, I ask myself if I will come back through it
if I can not go farther on, and I look at the route and see if there are
likely to be worst scenarios. I have choosen a route pretty carefully
before I leave home and know of "escape routes"(my greatest joy is pouring
over topo maps and wondering about whether a particular route is feasible;
guidebooks were not available and when they were, they were incomplete or I
had already done the route)

If I can not answer my questions.  I look at the messages I am giving
myself to make myself afraid (the "what if" questions).  Like: "I don't
know if I can find my way back through this area, or I don't know if I can
downclimb to the ledge". What will it take to answer the question? Then I
start nibbling.  I will climb up one move and climb down it, then climb up
two moves and then down.  By the time I have climbed above the ledge, I
know that I can downclimb that section and have practiced it, or I have
decided to try to find another option. Just because somebody else crossed a
river where the trail is does not mean that you will be sucessful doing so.

Most people turn around before they actually come up against an obstacle.
But here is the sticker: you have to have enough experience to know when
you are in danger and when you can not fake it.  And on steep snow(whether
it is 5 feet wide or 1000 feet)and bad river crossings, judgement can
happen too late. For both of these you can still nibble, but you have to be
even more cautious as things can happen so quickly.

Four of the river crossings on the PCT, I did not cross where the trail did
(Kings, Evolution, Bear,  and Kerrick).  Part of my caution is that I am
very short and short legged, and alone, so where somebody taller did not
have a problem ,was not necessarily helpful to me.  Each of these four
rivers I forded about 1/4 to a mile above the normal crossing.  I tried
Kerrick twice before I decided I wanted to look for a different crossing -
I nibbled out about 5-10 feet into the river and I could not stand still in
the current, it just pushed my feet downstream.  Eventually where I
crossed, I was able to wedge my feet between larger rocks (hurts a lot but
you're thinking of other things), and keep myself more stable to take the
next step).

I always left an itinery and maps with my husband, including each days
camp.  If I changed it, or felt really bad, I would write a letter, stamp
and address it and put it in the middle of a trail (in plastic, under a
rock) if I was going in, or had come down to a trail. Sometimes I just
carried it.  Writing clarifies the motivation, the intention, the
direction, the loneliness.  I also kept a journal which was very different
than the letters.

Lastly, I tried to look at the trip as a whole.  Was the whole thing very
rewarding already even through I was only half way through?. Was there a
wonderful flow and mojo just happening with even the smallest things, or
had it been a struggle from the very begaining? Sometimes when there are
too many questions, you can sit down for a day to enjoy the the rocks, and
moss, and trees and sky, and afterwards there is the peace and the flow to
go any direction you choose. If I was fighting myself, I would try to
create space.  I rarely did this on the thruhike as the exigency of miles
took over.  And I lost something !

Good Luck,

Goforth