[pct-l] Solo Female - Leaving Boyfriend At Home

[abiegen at cox.net]

Diane Soini of Santa Barbara Hikes wrote:
 
>The tables are turned now. On his section hikes I have really enjoyed  
>being Mission Control for him: mailing his packages, buying him  
>shoes, picking him up after the helicopters brought him off the  
>mountain.... 

Hey, that was only one helicopter that got me off the mountain, and if I had continued sliding I could have gotten to Palm Springs without their help!

Anyway, yes, I was the boyfriend left behind. At first I felt very put upon to have to stay at home and carry all the weight of responsibility but soon I was living vicariously through Piper's adventures and journal. It realy helped me get through some tough times at work. I would picture myself hiking with her. Here are some tips for you on how to engage your significant other:

1. Take a phone and call often early on. Being at home I sometimes felt like Piper wasn't calling enough and I would worry about her. After a while I realized that she could take care of herself and I didn't have to worry so much. When I hit the trail, I did find out that she did have cell phone coverage more often than she called but I also found that I didn't feel the need to call every time I had service. Some days you feel like you don't have anything new to report. Other days you are just too tired to talk. But the homebody will want to get as many calls as they can.

2. Get a wall map of the trail. Put it up on the walk so your boyfriend can get an idea where you are. It's helpful if it has a lot of the places on the trail so he can relate to where Scissor's Crossing or Hikertown are.

3. Get all the PCT DVDs and watch them together. Let him see the beauty of the trail and the people who hike it. Let him know you are not just walking up the side of I5 to Canada. There's special places to see.

4. Get him to come to Kick off with you. Boy that is sure a good way to catch the fever! Have him hike the first day or two with you so he can see what it is like. Meet as many thru-hikers as you can so he can read their journals too. He'll feel like he knows them.

5. If he lives close enough and he is a hiker, have him come meet you a few times on the trail. Sure this will be tougher to do once you are 800 miles into your hike and he is trying to keep up with you. I had the experience of being the desk-jockey meeting Piper near Mammoth Lakes and trying to keep up with her and a few of her thru-hiker friends. It's easier if you do it earlier in the hike.

6. If he is not a hiker but he lives close enough to the trail, have him meet you in a couple of trail towns. The PCT is like a trip back in time, in that, you go through beautiful little towns that have a feel of what the west looked like 50 years ago. He can resupply you, help you (and a bunch of your smelly thru-hiker friends) get around town, rub your feet and whatever.

7. If he is not a hiker but he doesn't  lives close enough to the trail, tell him you are only bringing one pair of undies and will be going commando in town. Believe me, he will find some way to get to the trail town! I didn't know that Piper was going commando in town or else I would have been at every one of them. (Note to self: delete this part before posting to PCT-L)

I have seen times when one person hiked the trail and the other did not and it didn't seem to work well at all. When Piper first hiked in 2008, we met a hiker the first day who was a strong hiker and really seemed to be at home on the trail. His fiance was not a hiker and was constantly calling him and asking when he was going to "do  the MAN thing and come home." He got off the trail a couple of times to be with her but then got back on. I don't remember if he finished the trail or the relationship.here have been other times where relationships we ended on the trail or made on the trail. No guarantees either way.

TrailHacker
--
"When my feet hurt, I can't think straight"
Abraham Lincoln