[pct-l] safety precautions for campers

[treerings at gmail.com]

My daughters and I were doing Mad Libs recently (remembers those?). I think
not only relate to hiking, but also to what to do if you see Journey on the
trail.

SAFETY PRECAUTIONS FOR CAMPERS

Attention, all campers! Just a few weeks ago you were a miserable EYEBALL,
living in the YUMMY city with your PRETTY parents. But a few weeks at Camp
OONA LOONA GOOGLE will turn you into a self-reliant, fearless FLUTE. But,
you must learn to exist in the wild.

Rule One: If you catch a TABLE and make a fire to cook it, always remember
to pour WINE on the fire when you're through. Smokey the DOG always says,
"OH MY GOSH!"

Rule Two: Do not go more than ZERO yards away from the trail. If you get
lost, remember that TEETH always grow on the north side of a JUMP ROPE. If
you have a compass, the needle will always point toward DISNEYLAND. If you
run into a bear, do not give it COOKIES. Just be calm and climb a SNAKE. If
you follow these rules, you can live very SLOWLY in the woods.